When Im wrong , you remembers .

All I wish for , is a listening ear .
Being deprieved of something .. laughs . stabs thru it . idk the reason hw to uds . i only uds how useless i'll feel .
为什么每次都是我牵就你。。没顾虑到我的感受，即使痛还是要面对，即使想逃避，你把我拉住然后演给我看。。ha ..
我要你告诉我，不你做不到，也不要你用甜言蜜语，很伤人！你懂吗！
Incompetent friend . When she needs you , you're not there. Now cry also no use . She in pain , no one's there for her . she's in sorrow , no one with her . and you're the cause . why did u leave her alone . why did u give her so much pain ..
眼泪直多少，心里的痛又怎么能被表达，
Presence that cannot be felt .
Feeling  -less .

Jealousy

短短的距离却有如此的忧伤与痛苦无人分享，

醋喝完了，你帮我买了一瓶回来，

不只你会吃醋，不想看，选择走，我也一样，可是我不能阻止你交朋友，不能盖住我的耳朵，不能蒙闭双眼。

即时我有一百万个剑指着你，判你的罪名，即使自己知道自己的直觉多准可是不想下定论因为我想最后一次相信你，可是看来，逃避没用，是始终就是是，无法改变的事实。chose to lie to myself the last time and says she wont de , she wont de , trust her .. does it even help ? when it didnt uh .

When I say I want bring med for you rub you're always unwilling and dw . she say only you agreed and let her bring . Sorry .. feel so ..  do so much for you yet the return is like tt . laughs .

I dont like when you let him go thr care for you when you pushed me away . I dont like when he's always able to be there for you when i cant .. I dont like when its nt the first time you dont share sorrow with me .. i dont like when you want me to leave you alone . I feel so useless .. that's the difference between me and him ba ..
你喜欢的不要认定我也会喜欢。

feelings

你可以若无其事地面对我，根本都不会内疚。。以前的你，去了哪里。。虽然让可是你知道我心里是痛痛痛。。

被心爱的人欺骗最心痛，你那句我爱你说得毫无意义。。你有感情，我也是人，我也有。。

When I'm right , no one remembers . When I'm wrong , no one forgets .

如果失望是用写的，我是用刻的，

部顾虑我的感受的你了解我的心情吗？

琬甯，即使在痛，在难过都要忍，即使自己身不由己也要忍，因为没有人理解你的心情，又不能说。这种感觉又有谁理解？。。无奈的心情，

your promise ,

我薛明慧，不管遇到多强的风，多大的雨，就算遇到海浪，我也会不顾一切，真心的保护，疼爱，全心的爱着傅琬甯，永远守护在她身旁，永不离开。

No matter what , you're already a big sister , and my dearest in my heart .

Letting go ,

may be a good choice after all . Let go of my jealousy feeling and learn to accept the ppl ard her , close to her and impt to her . cos i know , its only when she's happy then i will be happy .
u hurt ur spine becos of me .. bad mood becos I broke my promise to go out but i didnt in the end cos food poisoning and u went to drive ,bang ! thr goes the car , and the wall .. ha .. spine badly injured , dun care , wanted to break it so u will be wheelbound , so u wont get to choose the path , so u wont walk back to the past even though u wanted to .. i stressed too much on you ba . maybe i made u so stressed out and never encourage u along the way , only know how punish or to be sad , never say jiayous even though im doing so in my heart and hoping u will hear it .
i hope u will stand in my place and put urself in my shoes to think ..
holiday gt holiday the problems , sch days gt sch days the problems .. hais , holi , will go out alot of days , i wont have time to revise/do hw , will go pub drink , will smoke , will fight , will drive , wat thing break law de , u will have a part in it , sch days ppl will ask u go smoking , u will also want to , will keep sleeping in class , dun listen to lessons , loither ard after sch , go out at night . tell me what to do .. my dear ..
the dearest in ur heart and the big sister .. will you ever listen to my words once .

Should I ?

Im really thinking these days in camp what I should do . My mind tells me that I shouldnt be selfish .. should let her have her own friends too . She have the rights to , I cant deprieve her from it .. But why my heart just ache and bleeding when I sees it , when I hear it .. that jealousy feeling . Again . Ha . Go away lah ..
have been rejecting her even though she knows and wants to be with me .. but I've been really thinking if should let her go ..Give me awhile to think then .. hais ..
What should I do ? Just feel that she's the one who really can give u that security ba . That's why If I'll have to let you go , I'll . cos Im convinced .. even though I knw I'll tear .. but its okay .. dear ..

making the necklace .. Dunknow isit the right choice .. the fear of you leaving is strong and lingering inside me ..

Let me be selfish this time ,

Those memories are playing like a film without a sound , stabbing my heart ..

Its not the first time , Im trying so hard to hold onto you yet you're enjoying things that you shouldn't , I wonder whether you will think of me when you do things ,
心碎了，即使补了也会有裂痕 .
Let me selfish this time .. since u know i hate u keep msging so dun do it in front of me .. even though it seems impossible ,
even though i know the ans and what you gonna say , I know that but im running from reality do you uds .. in my heart the ans is alr thr but im praying nt to be it uh .. but it seems like reality is cruel .. hahahahaaha . hate it manz feeling . go die la . dun mention their names in front of me can .. heart's bleeding and you're slitting it deeper ..